What if there was a way to magically improve your relationships with people, especially when it became problematic or difficult?
Rhonda Byrne talks exactly about one such technique in her bestselling book, The Magic. The technique involved may sound a little woo-woo, however, having used it myself on various occasions over the past few years, I know that it definitely works.
The author explains that whenever we are faced with a problem in a relationship, whether involving our friends, family, partner, colleague or boss, we tend to blame and find fault with the other. However, this does nothing to improve the relationship but has quite the opposite impact.
You would have observed in your own life about how people tend to live up to and behave in line with the negative thoughts and beliefs you hold about them. This however, is simply an example of how the Law of Attraction operates in our lives. The Law of Attraction is a universal law which states that, like energy attracts like energy. It may otherwise be stated as; you attract what you focus on.
Our thoughts, feelings and beliefs send out energy, and we attract circumstances in our lives according to the energy we send out. The same applies when it comes to our relationships.
Here’s what you can do to improve a difficult relationship in your life or any relationship for that matter.
Take one relationship you’d like to heal or improve in your life
Write a list of 10 things (a minimum of 5) you are grateful for about the person and describe why you are grateful for it.
Go through each reason you have written and feel the feelings of gratitude.
By focusing our attention on what we are grateful for in the person, by the Law of Attraction, we attract more things to be grateful for in the relationship. The more grateful we are, the more the relationship will improve.
For the technique to work, it is essential that we let go of any anger, blame or negative emotion we may hold towards the person once we are through with this exercise.
This very technique is something I have used to improve my relationship with my eldest brother.
My eldest brother and I frequently used to get into verbal fights and annoy each other since we were young. While there would be periods when things would be okay between us, it didn't take long before the next fight broke out. Though I hoped the relationship would improve, I would subconsciously focus on reasons as to why it couldn’t.
Things began to change for the better after I took the time to write and focus on all the things I was grateful to my brother for. In the days and months that followed, not only did all the arguments and fights stop, I also found that my brother started becoming nicer, and our relationship has remarkably improved since.
Letting go of negative stories
We experience the result of the dominant thoughts and beliefs we hold about the people due to the operation of the Law of Attraction. Therefore for the power of gratitude to work in the long term, we must let go of holding on to any negativity.
We often tend to attach a story in our heads about people which describes them or sums up our relationship with them. These stories are like a tape that plays in our head subconsciously.
While some of these stories may be positive, others may be negative such as,
• Sarah is always mean to me.
• Rahul and I can never get along.
• My boss is always rude.
• He always gets angry at me.
The secret to great relationships is to keep our attention focused on the positive qualities and aspects of the person as well as the relationship.
Trying to heal or improve relationships through considerable effort and actions on the outside, while holding onto negative thoughts and beliefs about the person never works in the long term.
However, by changing the story you hold in your mind about the other person, you change how they behave and respond to you.
Take a relationship in your life you would like to improve and test this out and see it for yourself. You will be amazed at how your relationship starts to change for the better and realise that it takes only one person to heal and improve any relationship, through the power of gratitude.
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